Thursday, July 3, 2008

I Can Be Such A Wimp

Yesterday at the pool there was a teenage boy with Down's Syndrome along with someone who only looked to be in her early twenties (sister maybe?). Well, he was making loud noises in the pool and I smiled over at them a few times. While in the changing room I felt the Holy Spirit ask if I would pray for him to be healed and whole. I then (in my human brain) started thinking through the repercussions of God doing a creative miracle in the middle of the pool as people watched.

And, it scared me.

Lord...what if his family likes him the way he is? There is something so innocent about these children. What would he be like if he was completely healthy?

And, again, the Holy Spirit asked me if I would be willing to pray for him. And truthfully, I was shocked that I couldn't just march over and do this. I was thinking that if I prayed for him and God healed him what in the world would happen? People would be screaming and completely freaking out. And, then even worse, what if "nothing" happened. God, I've got to bring my family to this pool all summer....can we work up to this?

I finally resolved that if I sensed God was setting me up to do this, He would also provide the opportunity. So, for the next hour we passed by them in the pool and I smiled at them and made eye contact. At one point I think I said something like "Hello there". They probably thought I was some deranged stalker. It wasn't until they pulled out of the parking lot right ahead of us that I was so disappointed. Have I learned NOTHING in my walk with Christ? I almost felt like it was more of a test and while I gave God my honest answer, it was still way off the mark. And, if I see them again this week at the pool would I do anything about it?

That's the million dollar question.


Beautiful Grace said...

It's times like these that I believe God is revealing to us our weaknesses, so that we run to Him for strength.

There have been times when I've dropped the ball and times when, although scared, took the ball and ran. The thing that I've noticed is that even if a person is not healed physically, we cannot always see the emotional effects.

Most people are intimidated by someone with a "disability" so we keep our distance, when all they want is love, just like us. Physical healing is wonderful, and I am thankful our Lord blesses us with it, but high above the physical is the spiritual which touches both the physical and emotional and Love is the greatest gift we can give.

Basically, through my rambling, I'm trying to say that a loving word and prayer would impact greater than even healing. See 1 Corinthians 13.

Jesus, please help both of us to hear Your Holy Spirit and obey. Let Your Love flow through us and manifest however You choose...healing physical, emotional and spiritual. In Jesus' name! AMEN!!!

You're AWESOME and NOT A WIMP!!!!

Livin' Life said...

I am soo there with you. I struggle with this on a daily basis. There is this lady at Walmart that's in a wheelchair and she is always there. I wrestle with the Lord about praying for her and even the boys challenge me about it.

It hasn't happened yet so I can totally relate. I will be praying for more supernatural strength for you and you could keep me in your prayers about the same.:)