I Want the World to Know I Burn for You

And, again, I find myself meditating on another Toby Mac lyric. I headed over to the gym after everyone was in bed tonight and this song may as well be my anthem right now (I can't get it out of my head):

So, why don't You move me like You used to?
I want the world to know I burn for You.

This song is an awesome reminder that I don't have to live my life the same way I did yesterday. He restores me, He lifts me up and I don't have to stay "stuck" in my ruts. My latest rut is insecurity and it is not from God. It differs from conviction in the sense of there being no basis for the consuming thoughts that hover at the back of my mind....Should I have said that? Should I have done something? Did I do enough? Am I overdoing it? It isn't until I realize what is happening and stop to pray that I take every thought captive to Christ and realize this irrational scrutiny is not from God. I know a correction when it comes from my loving Father. It is quick and it is specific. It isn't just this vague feeling of heaviness that I can't quite put my finger on .......

So, when I heard this song tonight and realized that it is my heart's cry, it really opened my eyes to the truth. The truth is the heaviness and the insecurity I feel is from the one who wants to hold me back from pursuing all my Father has for me. I'm praying dangerous prayers and quite honestly, I'm not much of a risk taker. I'm the first born, "play it safe" kind of person. But, playing it safe doesn't see people healed and set free and living sold out, on fire for our God, who is real. Not some Oprah-new-age little "g" god. By the way, we really need to pray for Oprah.

I guess if I need to have a point it is this: I want to walk through every new door God opens, without hesitation and without the baggage of insecurity to drag with me. I'm ready. I seriously want the world to know "I'd rather burn for Him than fade away". And, I hope it's contagious.