Monday, August 27, 2007
Sometimes I Even Surprise Myself
I woke up this morning with a migraine and a tune in my head similar to the music that plays when Darth Vader is on screen. This is it. The day I send my kids to .........................PUBLIC SCHOOL. The dreadful feeling didn't last very long, which had to be the grace of God!
The dog days of summer are over. Surprisingly though, I feel ready. I remember when we would send them off to Christian school before we home schooled and my prayers focused on them making friends and not being made fun of or feeling left out. My prayers have shifted to asking the Lord to remind them of who they are and how wonderfully made they are when, not if, someone hurts their feelings. Of course, the mom in me doesn't want anyone to hurt their feelings, but we live in a world where even good people say rotten things. I want them to deal with it in a Godly, forgiving way that not only helps them feel better, but ministers to the hearts of those involved. I can't possibly be going through this "it's not about me, it's about Him" revelation and not pass it down to my kids! The older two seemed to really struggle last night because they just were not sure if they were going to be accepted. I reassured them they are loved by God, family and friends more than they could ever know and school is just a part of their lives, not even the most important part. I didn't want them all worked up because really, it is important for them to be educated, but WHO they are is so much more important than WHAT they know.
So, without shedding a tear for the first time EVER (including preschool), I dropped off all three little women at their schools today. The tears stung in the back of my eyes, but they were proud tears, not sad tears. Will I miss them? Absolutely. But, something deep inside me felt like I was releasing them into their destiny today. I know that may sound overly dramatic, but I had the sense at times in my life I was holding them back out of fear and trying to overly protect them. I still battle that. For example this morning as I was placing band aids is #1's purse "just in case", The Husband told #1 that I would put the kitchen sink in next and if there was room I'd pack myself in her backpack! Of course, we all laughed, but there was some truth to that!
Thus opens a new chapter in our lives. Tomorrow we FINALLY go to settlement on our old house and in less than 2 weeks The Husband starts his new job.
Wow. A lot can change in a year. :-)